ÿþ<HTML> <HEAD> <META name="Codiekitty" content="Nintendo, Video Games "> <TITLE>Five Top Five Lists, Pt. 1</TITLE> <style> p { margin-left: 5px; margin-right: 5px; } </style> </HEAD> <BODY BACKGROUND="../background.gif"> <P> <CENTER> <table bgcolor=white border=1 width=60% celspacing=1><tr><td><BR><CENTER><font size="5"><B><P>Five Top Five Lists, Pt. 1</font size></B></center><BR></td></tr></table> <BR> <table bgcolor=white border=1 width=100%"<tr><td><BR> <CENTER> <font size="+1"><B>The Five Stupidest Game Names</B></font><BR> </CENTER> <P>5. My Hero <BR> 4. Gradius 2: Gofer no Yabou <BR> 3. Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles <B>OR</B> Resident Evil Archives: Resident Evil<BR> 2. Beyond the Beyond <BR> 1. Lunar Walking School <BR> <BR></td></tr></table> <BR> <table bgcolor=white border=1 width=100%"<tr><td><BR> <CENTER> <font size="+1"><B>Five Signs a Game Has a Bad Ending</B></font><BR> </CENTER> <P>5. The game has multiple endings depending on if a character lives or dies, and you actually prefer the ending where they die. <BR> Ex: Sweet Home, Magi Nation <BR> <BR> 4. You got the "good" ending and are left dreading what the "bad" ending must be like. <BR> Ex: D, Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance. <BR> <BR> 3. The only other place you've seen that happen was on Mystery Science Theater 3000. <BR> Ex: Shadow of the Colossus and Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders, Prince of Persia 2008 and The Touch of Satan. <BR> <BR> 2. The game was supposed to be serious, then suddenly does something that would only be expected of a comedy. <BR> Ex: The corny joke for Sweet Home's "All five alive" ending, Panzer Dragoon Saga breaking the fourth wall. <BR> <BR> 1. You've left wondering what the hell you were accomplishing with the rest of the game. <BR> Ex: Mirror's Edge, Prince of Persia 2008, any game where you're told "TO BE CONTINUED" or the ending is just a black screen with "CONGRATULATIONS!" <BR> <BR></td></tr></table> <BR> <table bgcolor=white border=1 width=100%"<tr><td><BR> <CENTER> <font size="+1"><B>The Five Stupidest Big Reveals I Can Think Of Off the Top of My Head</B></font><BR> </CENTER> <P>5. The Divine Visitor is the player! <BR> 4. Lord Bellias wants to destroy the world to prevent the world from being destroyed! <BR> 3. Six of the seven are dead! And they were all killed by the seventh! When he was a kid! And one of them died twice!<BR> 2. The Harrises are descended from Dracula and Laura ate her mother! <BR> 1. His wife's brain is in his arm! <BR> <BR></td></tr></table> <BR> <table bgcolor=white border=1 width=100%"<tr><td><BR> <CENTER> <font size="+1"><B>The Five Most Cliched Game Name Templates</B></font><BR> </CENTER> <P>5. Shadow(s) of (the) [Something] <BR> 4. (The) Last [Something] <BR> 3. (The) Legend of [Somebody or Something] <BR> 2. (The) Adventures of [Name of the Main Character] <BR> 1. [Name of the Main Character]<BR> <BR></td></tr></table> <BR> <table bgcolor=white border=1 width=100%"<tr><td><BR> <CENTER> <font size="+1"><B>Top Five Things That Do Not Belong in 3D</B></font><BR> </CENTER> <P>5. Monkey Island - Part of it might be people basing the 3D Monkey Island graphics on the style used for Curse of Monkey Island, which I wasn't too wild about to begin with.<BR> <BR> 4. Pokemon - Pokemon are mostly drawn without skin, hair, or feather textures. You can get away with this for sprites. In 3D, it just makes them look like they're made of plastic.<BR> <BR> 3. The Simpsons - Every second I spend looking at a 3D Simpsons character is a second spent expecting their eyes to go rolling out of their sockets.<BR> <BR> 2. Yoshi - <a href="http://sweetbee.flyingomelette.com/yoshi.html" target=void>The bulbous fuck.</A><BR> <BR> 1. Earthbound - Even the official clay models give me the heebie-jeebies, and the way Ness and Jeff are rendered in Smash Bros. Brawl is the stuff of nightmares.<BR> <BR></td></tr></table> <BR> <CENTER><table bgcolor=white border=1><tr><td><A HREF="index.htm"> Back to MOREC</A><BR></TD></TR></TABLE></HTML>