Nightshade Insanity

or...

And You Thought Bionic Commando's Censoring Was Bad?


'The League of Unreasonable Gentlemen needs you! Are you sexist, wealthy, pmpous and overbearing? You could be just the person we're looking for! Inquire at the Pyramid Clube (superheroes need no apply). (Pg 7 - Mutant toads terrorise Russia!)'

You probably already read the first one, but the second...


'Tired of beiing a woman pushed around in a man's world? Ninjitsu could be for you! As at the Chopstick and Shuriken Five Star Academy of the Concealed Ferret.(Pg 5 - Man eats fence and lives!)'

The strange tastes of Metro City return.


'Egyptian exhibitions now in town! Come and see the Star of Cairo, the Sacred Papyrus of Tanis (TM), and the infamous Idol of Sutekh. (Pg 2 - Alien TV fans shave heads!)'

Some people have too much time on their hands.


'Man jogs around Australia - by mistake!' (Pg 2 - Fires Siamese twins in space!) (Pg 11 - Giant mutant squid hit our beaches!)'

Some people have WAY too much time on their hands.


'Professor Sandleford, famous Egyptologist, announced his retirement today. He intends to continue his work from the peace and quite of his armoured, high-security bunker in the west of Metro City(Pg 8 - Man kidnaps two-headed tortoise!)'

Some people just really need a job.


Warning! Nightshade Spoilers Draw Near! To Run, Click here!

'Sutekh Beware the Staff of Ra (Ominous Warnings LTD.)' 'Are you reading this? Then so are your customers! For advertising, contact Sutekh Ads. Inc. Telephone 555-EVIL''Baast eats canned food! Nyah nyah!'

'Congratulations! You've discovered the secret lair of Sutekh.' 'For a free sample of what's waiting in the next room, just press the eye!'ZZZAP! I hate it when that happens.

Here's the pathway to Sutekh. Funny how Nightshade's hat has a skeleton.


So Nightshade! We meed for our final battle! You fool - evil always triumphs. First I shall control Metro City - Then phase two of my plan begins. TV game shows will be broadcast 24 hours a day. Flares will come back in style - wooden nickels will be legal
tender...!

This has to be the funniest thing I've ever read in a video game. Such a shame he doesn't up much of a fight.

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